This weekend, my family and I headed to Cowtown to celebrate my mother and brother's birthday. While there, I made a charm for my sister-in-law, which inspired this post, which is coming to me in two parts.
Part One: In order to work on the charm, I had to wait for the kids to go to bed. The main reason for this is that I needed to be able to concentrate on what I was doing, which is hard with kidlets crawling in my lap, wiping boogers on my jeans, or demanding I bring them something else to stuff in their mouths. But lurking just behind the main reason was the fact that as I learn more about how I practice and my beliefs and I mold each other, I'm not sure how to go about teaching them all this...stuff. I mean, I talk a lot about Mother Nature with them, but not THE Mother (more on this in Part Two). I point out the Moon, I try to include them in little rituals like setting New Moon goals and such, but I have a difficult time, for some odd reason, with making a religious practice part of our home.
Part of it, I think, is that Will is a Christian, although I would definitely NOT call him a fundamentalist Christian in any way. He is essentially a private man, and talking about his faith is not something he enjoys doing. I don't want to go against his beliefs or remove him from the kidlets' religious upbringing--and I have absolutely no problems with the teachings of Jesus of Nazareth.
But the other part is that there is just SO MUCH. So much I don't know yet or haven't nailed down and so much actual work that I do. There are Pagan parenting sites, of course, but many of them seem to assume that you know what the heck you're doing all the time or jump right into hardcore gods and goddesses and altars and the like. And I'm just not really sure where to start. Living Under the Buckle, I don't want to make their childhood difficult or mess with their little minds. It's just a wee overwhelming to me, trying to figure out where to start.
Part Two has a lot to do with this. As I worked the charm with my sil, I found myself "teaching her" as I went along. Everything we did, from gathering acorns and paying attention to symbols on our walk to picking the embroidery threads for the design on the charm, was accompanied by me telling her why I was doing what I did. I really enjoyed it, but it wasn't (PAUSE FOR A MAJOR FREAKOUT: My Mother stone is missing. This is my most sacred thing and I can't find it. Please send me some good "return to NotHannah" vibes, mkay?) what I usually do when I make charms. It really highlighted for me the need I have to sort of...qualify? Qualitate? Something or other...my beliefs. I feel like I should start writing it down for my own sanity. (Seriously, I've completely lost my train of thought without my Mother stone. Eep.) At the same time, it seems like a possible waste of time, because I'm not SURE about all of my beliefs.
What I am sure of is A: I look forward to hearing your thoughts and B: I look forward to getting my stone back, because I now feel like my brain is jumbling out of my head. Happy Monday. Sigh.
*UPDATE: Stone has been found, brain getting back into order. Yay!*