Okay, y'all, here's the thing:
No, I'm enraged. I am simply quaking with horror and rage and shock at the oil RIVER spewing into the Gulf. As a person, an American, a consumer...I'm upset. But as a Pagan, I am gone beyond simple upset.
We are killing my deity. Worse, we are making Her kill herself AND Her children. Our greed and consumption and blithe ignorance of the way the world works is causing the death of something ultimately sacred to me.
In my weird, strange, two- and three- and, okay, occasionally four-faced faith, Mother wears many clothes: She hides herself in Earth. She shines like the Moon. And She wears, always, a cloak of blue flowing around Her.
The Ocean is Mother: the warm, wet place from which we came. The source of our rain, our mist, our wind. The Seas are what make Earth unique in our solar system--perhaps our galaxy. Without the Seas, humans could not be.
How lucky the Christians are, with their god who died for their sins and then got to go to Heaven. Our goddess is dying BECAUSE of our sins, but here is no heaven for Her. We are making a Hell of Her. For Her. It makes me want to wail.
I hate feeling so helpless. I HATE feeling as if there is nothing I can do. I want to punch the BP exec who wants his "life back" square in the kisser. I want to SHAKE the people who try act as if liberals or environmentalists are the bad guys when we say, "Um, hi. THIS is what we've been talking about." I can't STAND it when politicians posture to figure out which angle is best to reach the largest number of voters.
But, ultimately, this can't be about my politics or my rage. This must be about my love. I love my planet. I love my Mother. I want to help Her, somehow. I can cut back on driving, I can recycle, I can stop buying plastic. I can do all of these things. But I can't stop the flow of the oil. I can't clean up all of those animals. I can't stop the death.
But I can't help thinking...maybe...if we all work together...we can heal Her. We can HELP heal Her. We can, at the very least, show Her our love.
The New Moon falls on the 12th this month. This is, perhaps coincidentally, the first evening I will spend on vacation. I will be on my favorite island, surrounded by the cool waters of the Atlantic. I'm planning, once the kidlets are asleep, to make my way down to the beach, down to the waves, and smooth my hands over the water. I will say, "Peace be with you, Mother. Take from me what strength you need to heal yourself and your children." And I will send as much love and light and peace back into Her as I can.
Will you join me? Will you find your way to the water, even if it's a bowl of tap water from your kitchen? Will you help me send love and light and peace and STRENGTH back to our Mother as we try to help Her heal herself?
Let me know. Maybe we can make this a movement. Maybe we can turn the tide of consumption and greed and ignorance. Maybe...