Halloween Giveaway Fun With Mrs. B

This year, I'm participating in Mrs. B's 31 Days of Halloween!  Yay!  What this means is that if you go here and follow the instructions, you are entered to win a charm made by Yours Truly that will be something along these lines:

 or maybe this:

Or maybe something else, based on a few new designs I've come up with.  The point is, if you sign up over at Mrs. B's, you'll be signing up for a chance to win a charm made by me, stuffed full of herbs grown by me, stones or shells or pebbles or feathers found by me, and as many good intentions I can fit in there.

Good luck!

Having Our Candy Corn and Eating It, Too

Willow Silverwitch over at A College Witch's Experiences posted a link to the story that has been circulating around the witchy community over the past few days (no, not the one about That O'Donnell Woman) in which a school district in Washington state canceled annual Halloween celebrations in order to be more "respectful" to members of the Wiccan/Pagan community.  The supposed logic was that the "traditional" Halloween witch (warts, cauldron, cackle, etc.) was disrespectful to those of us who rally around a witchy flag and, thus, the celebrations shouldn't go forth.

I say "supposed" because many folks have opined that this is just a veiled attempt by Christian parents to purge the schools of all things witchy as Paganism becomes more widely-known and accepted.  This seems plausible to me.  It also seems plausible that this might be a backlash against the protests of Christmas parties and Easter parades made by those living outside the Christian umbrella. 

In any case, some witchy folk seem to be very upset about this whole thing, and I have to say...it surprises me a little bit.  It seems to me that if Wicca and Paganism in general are mainstream enough to be purged from the schools, we ought to be happy.  It means we've risen to the status of a "top tier" religion in the eyes of the district.  Sigh.

Here's the thing:  if you are a witch and you are arguing that Halloween should be allowed to be celebrated in schools because it's a sacred holiday, in my opinion (I'm sorry...I know this will upset folks), you are missing the point.  Public schools should NOT be the place where children learn about the religious traditions of various faiths. 

Now, before you flame me and call me ugly names and question my witchitude, I KNOW.  Public schools in America--and particularly in my particularly sweaty home Under the Buckle--have long been places where children were made to pray to a Christian god, pledge allegiance to a Christian nation, and been made to listen to stories about empty Easter eggs over the intercom.  (My head exploded more than one time when I was a public school teacher.  Remind me to tell you about the football game I went to once in which the flag corps of the visiting team's band came marching across the field carrying giant, purple-draped crosses.  I almost fell out on the sidelines gasping "separation of church and state" while my fellow teachers murmured about how beautiful the entire sequin-bedazzled spectacle was.)  BUT that doesn't make it right and federal case after federal case has come down the pipe which uphold the idea that public schools CAN'T subject children to religious indoctrination. 

My point is this:  we can't say that we want Halloween to be celebrated at schools because it's sacred to us.  I mean, we CAN, of course, but that doesn't make it Constitutionally correct.  If you want your children to celebrate Halloween as a religious holiday, that is your right as an American and more power to you.  Hold your kids out from school and use a religious holiday excuse and if your school wants to start something with you, I will be there with bells on and my copy of the Bill of Rights pasted to my forehead (with eyeholes cut out, of course.) However, if you want to complain about how the school won't let you celebrate a religious holiday at school, I'm sorry, I'm out.  I won't get all rowdy with the Christians about this, either.  Or the Muslims or Jews or Hindus or even the Worshippers of the File Cabinet.  Because I don't believe that any religious celebrations should occur at public schools.

Now...that doesn't mean that I can't get behind the idea of a secular holiday celebration.  Bring on the witches and cauldrons and jack-o-lanterns and whathaveyou.  Because even if those things have a religious BASIS, they do not, in our modern times, represent religious PRACTICE.  They are cultural levelers, in my mind.  A kid is just a kid when she puts on a Pink Power Ranger costume.  Skin color, religion, even gender don't matter on Halloween.  We're all just crazy people eating candy and dressing up.

The same thing goes, for me, with Christmas celebrations.  (And here's where I become even MORE separated from many in the witchy community.)  Santa Claus and Christmas stars might have religious bases, but they are not, in current practice, religious.  Again, they are cultural levelers.  Any child can believe in the magic of Santa, no matter what his or her background.  Yet some witches and Pagans get NUTS over others in our belief circle who celebrate the Jolly Old Elf. 

My question is...can we have it two ways?  If we want as a belief circle for our "out of the box" religion to be acknowledged, doesn't that mean that it has to be separate from the public domain?  If we want people to see Halloween as a religious holiday, doesn't that mean that we have to stop embracing the secular aspect of it?

I really don't know the answer to these questions.  All I know is that wanting to have our candy corn and eat it too comes a little too close to the righteous indignation of Christians who get all peeved at the commercialism of Christmas while railing against the phrase "Happy Holidays."

So, to sum up, I really feel, ehh, in short, to recap it slightly in a clearer version, in the words of David Cassidy:  religion is hard. 

Your thoughts?

Feeling the Lack of a Congregation

It's the New Moon again.  I am determined to Meet at the Water (who's in?) tonight and offer up some healing (and maybe get some in return), but the truth is that this week has hit me like a few ton of bricks and when I realized this morning that there were three fairly important things I had meant to do this week and NONE of them got accomplished, I'll be honest when I said, "Unnnnhhhhh....PLUS the New Moon. Greeaaat."

I'm having a hard time putting into words what I mean.  (I've erased the following paragraph at least fifteen times.  Frankly, I'm not sure that you'll actually get to read any of what I'm about to write right now.  And now I'm having some kind of weird, existential blog crisis.  EXCELLENT.)  But it occurs to me that times like this is when it would be outstanding to have a congregation.  Coven.  Circle?  It would be outstanding to have a group of people who worship in a way vaguely related to the way I worship so that somebody could call me up and say, "Hey, are you Meeting Us at the Water tonight?  Connie filled her birdbath and is making spaghetti."  And I'd be all, "Yeah, we are SO there.  I'll bring a pie." 

I'm going to use the word "congregation" here, so nobody freak out.  Feel free to substitute whatever word for "a group of people who worship in the same way" floats your boat. 

Anyway, a congregation acts as a reminder--a living, breathing, able to be touched reminder--that we are all connected by one purpose.  That there are days of the year that are sacred and to be honored.  That there are rituals that are important. 

One thing I've noticed during the last year that I've been functioning as a Pagan online is that there is a...looseness in Paganism.  And at first, I really loved that.  I would fret about missing a Sabbat or solstice or phase of the Moon and people would say, "It's okay.  The goddesses and gods understand."  And any guilt or concern I had would float away.  I mean, it didn't really MATTER to Mother Nature if I forgot it was the Full Moon, right? She had plenty of other folks to deal with.

But now, that looseness seems...reckless?  Dangerous?  No, not that.  (Hi.  I'm thinking out loud.  Bear with me.)  It feels wrong to poopoo the gentle understanding I've gotten from so many of you.  That love and kindness is one of the reasons that I've grown deeper in my faith.  But it feels, now, that the vagueness is...disrespectful.

Yeah.  I'm gonna go with that. 

If I believe that Mother Nature and the Elements and the Moon and Sun take care of me, shouldn't I honor that steadfastly?  If I believe that those entities not only give me life and a home, but also a spirit with which to connect to them, shouldn't I set aside days to really THANK them for that existence?

I mean, I try to live that way.  Recycling and trying to exercise more and be outside more and gardening...heck, even COOKING...are ways in which I connect to that which I feel called to honor spiritually.  But...is that enough?

Perhaps one of the reasons why the Judeo-Christian religions flourish is because from the beginning, they relied on big wads of people getting their prayer on en masse. They had specific times in which to get their prayer on--special days, festivals, rituals. 

There is comfort in being part of a spiritual group.  I remember the Christian congregations I communed with long ago very clearly.  I might have spent my time during the sermons rolling my eyes and feeling stifled, but I loved the big meals in the fellowship hall.  I loved getting hugs after the service and playing with the kids in the parking lot and gossiping with the old ladies about the other old ladies during picnics. 

There is also safety.  Maybe one of the reasons it's so difficult to come out of the broom closet is that there are so few of us in some areas that doing so is dangerous, even if it's only in a social way.  How much easier would it be to come on out and say, "I'm a witch" if you could do so revival-style, in front of a crowd of people who would congratulate you and hug you and tell you how happy they were for you?

Now, I'm not knocking my internet congregation.  When I say I love you, I mean it.  But I wish I could SEE you and give you squeezes and look into your faces tonight instead of clacking away on my keyboard tomorrow and reading about your experiences.  It's lovely to read them.  It makes me smile to do so.  But I want to smile WITH YOU. 

Sigh.  I think that part of this is that I just feel so...disconnected from the people around here in general.  They are mostly good folks, but while we're all excited about the big fair that starts tomorrow and the cooler weather and football season, few of them are feeling the spiritual rush I get from this time of year.  (Or if they are, they're staying mum about it.)  I'd love to take a walk in the woods with somebody who FEELS this time of year the way I do.  Or sit up late talking with her.  Or sit quietly by a pond and commune with Mother Nature with her. 

Am I the only solitary who feels like this?  Any members of a congregation have any advice for times like this? 

Hope you all have good days.  Meet you at the Water tonight...

Are We Looking At a Schism or a Bridge?

The other day, I received a comment on the post Hanging Out in the Broom Closet. You can read the whole of the comment at the link, but the gist of it was:  You shouldn't be afraid to proclaim your Paganicity and if you are hiding in the broom closet, shame on you and your little dog, too.  The commenter was "Anonymous," which I found amusing.  And irritating.  When I called the commenter on it, she responded with her name.  Now, at that point in time, I considered going off on her in the comments, because her comment made me angry and defensive.  But a cooler head prevailed...who am I kidding?  Y'all, I just got caught up in the insanity of my week, and I didn't have time to respond.  Luckily, in the intervening time, I came to a place where I no longer wanted to call the commenter a poopyhead, and I was able to read her comment for maybe something encouraging.  Maybe.

Then this morning, I was toodling around on Twitter and found that The Domestic Witch had posted a plethora of articles centering on That O'Donnell Woman's silliness (and the Pagan community's response to it), as well as this article, which puts forth the interesting idea that the traditional, Gardnerian Craft is being eroded or forgotten or made less mysterious (I'll be honest and say that I was a little confused at times during the article) as the tenets of it are being broadcast across the interwebs and, thus, folks don't have to rely on groups or covens for their teaching.  Clearly, as a solitary witch who does NOT follow the Gardnerian tradition (at least not wholly), I don't know how I feel about this, although I was sort of mystified by, once again, the concept of witches having a responsibility to come out of the broom closet.

THEN I started thinking about a conversation I had with my Pagantastic brother about some advice I'd given him.  He had bound somebody, a practice with which I don't agree.  I just feel icky about binding, although I have worked protective spells to shield myself or others against specific people.  In any case, he had contact with that person again, which to me meant that he'd wonkied up the binding, because he'd voluntarily resumed contact with that person.  I felt very strongly about it, but he felt very strongly the other way.

So during a loooooonnnng field trip with my son's class yesterday, I was stewing over this whole thing.  I'm not sure if the pieces all fit together the way I want them to, but here's what I was left with:

• I don't believe any person of any faith has the right to tell any person of any faith how to make his or her peace with his or her deity.  I don't think Baptists have the right to tell Mormons they aren't Christians, and I don't believe that a Gardnerian witch has the right to tell a Hellenic worshipper that she isn't venerating the right goddess. I DO believe that we need to listen more to each other, however, even when what we're listening to doesn't jibe with our own beliefs. 
• The Pagan community is NOT one homogeneous wad of folks, and this is bound to cause some problems for us as we become more active and accepted in our society.  I think it is going to become important for leaders to start stepping forward and working together even as we grow stronger in our individual beliefs.  Maybe this is already happening, and I don't know about it.  All I know is that That O'Donnell Woman has put us on the map and we'd better pull ourselves together.  You know, spiff up the cauldrons, put out the clean altar cloths, polish our pentagrams, trim the herbal knot in the front yard...
• The broom closet is an uncomfortable place, really.  It smells like cleaning supplies and dust bunnies and, Mother help us all, I think I just spotted a spider over there.  BUT--it is SAFER for me and and for my family for me to lurk here a while.  I envy the folks who are free to be you and me, but I'm not.  Being completely "out" would make it difficult for me with some of my family members.  And, yes, Jessica, if people really care about me, they'll love me regardless of my faith.  The sad thing is that our lives don't just depend upon the people who care about us.  We have to work and live in communities which are full of people who don't give a rat's ass about us--they need our services or our taxes or our business and as long as they have that, they're content.  But because we need them as well, for their services or goods or jobs, we have to walk a fine line.  Of course, I could always sue somebody who refused to hire me because I was a witch, which would make life nigh to impossible for me in my community.  Could I move to a place more understanding?  If there was a job there for my husband and a climate we'd enjoy and good schools and...do you get my drift?  
• I love the Pagan community I've found online.  It is, by and large, supportive and eager for connection.  And even if that isn't a "real" coven, it's what I've got to work with.  I LEARN from folks here.  I share my own knowledge.  Heck, we've WORKED together, when we Meet at the Water.  Yes, there are those of us who are newbies.  Or those of us whose hearts aren't in it.  But...there are folks in "real" covens or groups or enclaves or whatever exactly like that.  Are those covens or groups or enclaves less real because of them?
• I worry about the Pagan community I've found.  I haven't had many negative experiences within it, but the ones I've seen can very quickly turn ugly and bitter, with folks taking sides and calling names.  We must work together to be understanding and supportive when we come to those gaps in beliefs that can become schisms within our community that cannot be bridged.  

Of course, it's entirely possible that I'm going on too few hours of sleep and taking this all too seriously.  I might wake up in a few minutes and find that I've written this post in my dreams (and thus have to write it all over again, which would make me CRAZY.  I mean...it would drive me crazy.  Crazier?  Sigh...)  If  I haven't, I want to say to Jessica:  thank you for making me think.  I believe that you are wrong about the necessity for people to come out of the broom closet--and for the belief that it is a simple thing to do.  But I hope that folks will always feel that they can speak openly here--and that they will meet people with open minds and hearts when they do it.